INFJ Boyfriend: How to Understand Your INFJ Partner

INFJs are some of the rarest people out there, and even more rare is the INFJ male. INFJs as boyfriends can be truly amazing and rewarding partners, but they also can be challenging to fully understand at times. INFJs don’t show themselves to others easily, and often do this over time in many different layers. It is important for their loved ones to be patient with them and to take the time to show the INFJ that they can be trusted with their heart. They feel things deeply and care about being supportive of their significant other, which is why being vulnerable can actually be somewhat terrifying for them. In order to be there for your INFJ boyfriend, you need to be patient with them and take the time to understand the many different layers of their personality.

They Are Compassionate

INFJs are naturally in tune with the emotions of others, which makes them compassionate and empathetic people. As boyfriends the INFJ rarely likes to play games or follow the regular conventions of society. They have their own way of responding to their feelings for someone, and don’t want to do anything which can be misleading or leave someone feeling hurt. INFJs are rarely into game playing, and so they want to build something real and sincere with someone special. They don’t usually fit into the stereotypical expectations of what a boyfriend is or should be, but that is part of what makes them capable of being truly incredible romantic partners. They want to be able to show that they care for someone, and don’t want to have to pretend. When they care for someone and feel the desire to express this affection, the INFJ is not going to hold back for the sake of image. In a relationship they are warm and giving people, often willing to go above and beyond for the person they love. This makes the INFJ boyfriend a truly special partner to have in life, as they don’t care about what other people think or what they expect and instead focus much more on the needs of their loved ones. They might not fit into stereotypes or expectations, but anyone of value can see just how amazing that truly is. 

They Want Deep Connections

INFJs don’t want shallow or meaningless interactions, instead they want deep connections which will last. When they are with someone it is because they feel something real for them, and this isn’t about games or in the moment desires. The INFJ boyfriend is searching for someone who can spark their soul and make them feel a true connection. When they decide to enter into a relationship with someone, they want this to go much deeper than the surface. They want to know their partner in ways that no one else ever has, and they want to feel safe opening up as well. For the INFJ it is about knowing one anothers hopes and dreams and inner secrets, not just the things they show to everyone with ease. This can certainly cause the INFJ to be a bit picky when it comes to romantic relationships, as they don’t want to just settle for what is in front of them. They are often searching and hoping for the idea connection, something which makes them feel excited and passionate about what they have together. The INFJ as a boyfriend wants to be with someone they can see changing their lives, someone who makes them feel like a better version of themselves and inspires them for the better.

Don’t Lie to Them

INFJs are somewhat like human lie detectors, especially the ones who have become more mature in their strengths. When they are confident in themselves and their natural abilities, they are incredible at reading when someone is lying to them. They can sense when there is something off between themselves and their partner, and they can feel that strain even when people are trying to hide it from them. For the INFJ having someone who does not lie to them or try to betray their trust, is crucial. They can easily sense when they are being lied to or when their partner is hiding something serious, and this will immediately damage the trust between them. The more lies they feel coming from that person, the closer the INFJ will get to the door slam. This is not something they search for, instead they will go a long time trying to search for ways to fix the situation.

Respect Their Need for Alone Time

INFJs require plenty of alone time, but this is not something which should be taken personally. It isn’t always easy being someone who is so different from others, and this can certainly be something which weighs on the INFJ after a while. They need a partner who appreciates their differences and who gives them space to be themselves. This need for alone time is simply part of the INFJ and their introverted personality. Without this time to recharge they become emotionally and mentally exhausted and feel completely overwhelmed by the world around them. In order to work through their own thoughts and emotions the INFJ needs to have time to recharge, and they need someone who does not make them feel guilty for this. While stereotypes can make it seem like most men or boyfriends will be capable of letting these things roll off their shoulders without caring, this just isn’t the case for the INFJ. They care deeply, they feel things deeply, and they experience intense guilt when their partner does not understand their needs. They will often try to push themselves and exhaust their energy in hopes of making their partner happy and fulfilling their needs first. It is important that their significant other does not let this happen, and instead makes time for the INFJ and their needs as well. There is nothing the INFJ will appreciate more, than having a loved one who puts their needs first and who actually makes time for their emotions in their lives.