Written By Kirsten Moodie
How Each Personality Type Handles Rejection
Rejection is a natural and painful part of life, but we all handle it in different ways. Here is how each personality type handles feelings of rejection.
INFJs are often very discriminating about who they let into their worlds, which can often make rejection very painful for them. They often will not open enough to most people, which means very few people even get the opportunity to reject them. If an INFJ opens up to someone that they care about and are rejected by them, it hurts very much. It is a gift for the INFJ to let someone in, which means that rejecting that gift is a complete violation to them. It is important for the INFJ to remain hopeful and understand that there will be other people who will appreciate them completely and won’t take their relationship lightly.
ENFJs are hard-working individuals who care very much about helping those around them. If they feel rejected by someone it can be very painful for them to experience. They want to make others happy and if they feel like someone is rejecting their help, it can truly be hard for them to handle. ENFJs spend most of their time getting hard work done and trying to do things for other people. Their constant need to make people happy is definitely something that causes them to take rejection rather harshly. The best thing for ENFJs to do when they are feeling rejected, is to pull closer to the many people who appreciate their talents and effort.
INFPs are often very private people and may have a hard time putting themselves out there. They usually fear the idea of being rejected, which can cause them to hold back around others. Their feelings and thoughts are very personal to them. Their emotions run very deep for INFPs, which can make being rejected rather painful. When INFPs open up to someone they can be very disappointed by rejection, especially since they have probably already gotten their hopes up rather high that things will work out well. The best thing for an INFP to do when they feel hurt by someone, is to remain hopeful and confident in themselves, accept that this person just isn’t meant to be in your life in the way you believed.
ENFPs are actually rather deep and sensitive individuals, which can cause them to struggle with rejection. They want people to like them for who they are, and might place high expectations when it comes to others. If someone rejects an ENFP they will often be rather hurt by this and may lash out. Ultimately they will internalize this sadness and might even blame themselves for it. It simply takes time for an ENFP to overcome this rejection, as well as many different distractions to keep them going. Their warm and caring hearts can often make ENFPs struggle when they are rejected by others, but in time they will heal.
INTJs handle rejection differently depending on how emotionally invested in that persons opinion they are. If the person rejecting the INTJ is not someone who they value or trust, then they will certainly not be phased by this. They do not take the opinions of everyone seriously, which means they are often good at guarding against the pain of rejection. If the INTJ does value the individual who is rejecting them, they might take time to try and understand why this happened. It will be upsetting for a time but eventually the INTJ will do best to look towards the future. They are good at letting go of someone if they feel it is entirely necessary.
ENTJs are very intelligent individuals who often favor logic over emotions, but that does not mean they can’t be hurt by rejection. If they are being rejected by someone they care about and trust, it can be rather upsetting for an ENTJ. They favor loyalty very highly, which can make someone turning their back on them feel very painful for an ENTJ. They may attempt to understand why the rejection has occurred and if the situation can be fixed. If it seems like the person is simply being unreasonable, the ENTJ will be capable of moving on and looking towards the future.
INTPs have a tendency to repress their emotions, especially when it comes to rejection. This can cause them to lash out in unhealthy ways later on if they go too long without accepting their feelings. INTPs often appear very hard on the outside, but their emotions run rather deep. They rarely put themselves out there, so when they do take a chance rejection can be rather upsetting for them. It may be a blow to their confidence for a little bit before they take time to logically understand the situation. It is important for INTPs to accept their emotions in order to move on and take more chances in the future.
ENTPs are often capable of accepting that rejection is an inevitable part of life. This causes the ENTP to attempt to learn from these situations and possibly grow from them. They see every opportunity as a chance to grow and reach a deeper understanding, since they despise staying stagnant for too long. ENTPs will often reflect on the situation, even if they don’t make this reflecting time clear to everyone else. It may be upsetting at first but they will be more than able to get over it and move on rather quickly.
ISFJs put a lot of effort into helping others, which can make rejection rather upsetting to them. They work hard in every aspect of their lives and truly want to make people happy. When someone rejects an ISFJ they may blame themselves at first and will internalize the situation. If they feel guilty it can be a bit upsetting to them for a while. Eventually they will be okay, especially if the rejection was not done by someone close to them. If the person who rejected the ISFJ is someone they care for deeply, they will often try and find a way to fix the situation and create harmony once again.
ESFJs often handle rejection differently depending on who has rejected them. If it is a complete stranger, or someone that the ESFJ does not value, they might become momentarily irritated but will often brush it off. If someone that the ESFJ cares for very deeply has rejected them, it will be rather painful for them. They will often internalize the rejection and attempt to find a way to fix whatever has gone wrong. ESFJs love the people close to them very deeply, and will often work very hard to mend the situation.
Depending on the situation ISTJs will often try to find a way to fix whatever has gone wrong. They will try and take a step back and look at why the rejection occurred. If it seems like something they have done wrong, they will work hard and try to make it better. If the ISTJ sees that it wasn’t something they did wrong, they will be very capable of moving on and ignoring the rejection. They know where they stand and are not going to be pushed around by someone who thinks they know better than them.
ESTJs are born leaders, which can often make rejection rather frustrating for them. They value efficiency and if someone is accusing them of not doing a good job, it can be rather upsetting. ESTJs want to be seen clearly as hard-working and capable people, and they try very hard to maintain this image. If someone rejects them or their abilities it can actually affect them rather deeply. They will often attempt to fix the situation but if they cannot they might become angry.
ISTPs often do not open themselves up to many people, which means they are fairly skilled at avoiding rejection. They do not value the opinion of complete strangers and are relatively good at ignoring rejection. If an ISTP has accepted someone and cares deeply for them, their rejection might be upsetting to them. They will often attempt to analyze the situation and figure out why the rejection has occurred. Once they have done this they will be capable of moving forward.
ESTPs actually become very upset if someone they care for rejects them in any way. They often are good at ignoring the opinions of strangers and might even find it amusing that those people are rejecting them. When it comes to people they care for, ESTPs may take the rejection very harshly. They will often attempt to figure out why it occurred and might become rather frustrated.
ISFPs are extremely internal and private individuals, but they do not handle rejection well. They rarely open themselves up to people, so when they are rejected it can truly hurt them. They will often internalize it and retreat into their introverted shell. Over time the ISFP will be able to overcome their sadness once they accept that rejection is a part of life. They will do best to understand that the person rejecting them, simply was not meant to be in their lives in the way they had hoped.
ESFPs often struggle with rejection, especially since they desire to be liked by others. They might find a way to ignore the rejection if they keep themselves busy. It is often best for the ESFP to turn to people who can help them feel better when someone else has hurt them. They usually have many friends, since they are fun and social individuals. Instead of dwelling on the person who rejected them, they will do best to draw close to the people who care about them.
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