Here’s Everything You Need to Know About the INFJ Child
Each personality can be challenging to type until adulthood, since they are still developing and changing. While it might not be easy to decipher someone’s type until they are an adult, there are still things they often struggle with and face as they are growing up. During their younger years they might not know themselves that well, but parts of their personality to come to light. Here are a few things you should know about the INFJ child.
They Are Independent
The INFJ child often has a strong sense of independence, since they need so much time on their own. Most parents have a hard time understanding this, and might think there is something wrong with the INFJ child. Without a strong comprehension of the INFJs introversion, it can be difficult for them to get the time alone that they truly need. Their parents might misunderstand this and this only makes things more confusing for the child. They need parents who are willing to give them space, but who also know how to connect with them when they need it.
They Need Support Even Though They Don’t Ask for It
The INFJ child often needs to feel appreciated for who they are, but this can be challenging. If they are faced with parents who attempt to change them or fit them into a box, it will truly hurt them. They likely won’t even understand this fully, not as children. The INFJ will likely feel misunderstood and struggle to try and fit into the role they are assigned by their parents. It is challenging for them, since they feel so different and have a hard time holding back who they are.
The INFJ child won’t often be open with their feelings and needs, but at the same time all they truly desire is for their parents to accept them for who they are. The best way to raise the INFJ child in a comforting and loving home, is to allow them to be themselves. Parents who push their own views upon the INFJ child, are simply going to create pain and frustration within their child. Most parents don’t realize this, but the INFJ needs their space and room to understand themselves without being told how to behave.
They want to feel supported for who they are, and are happiest with parents who help them along the way instead of trying to control them too much. The INFJ is unhappy when they feel smothered in this way, the most important thing for them is feeling loved unconditionally.
They Often Feel Like Outsiders
INFJs often feel like outsiders even from a young age, making it challenging for them to fit in. They can understand and navigate ways to properly blend in, but it can be difficult for them to want to actually do this. The INFJ child often feels different from other children in some ways, making them feel more comfortable inside of their own inner minds. They might prefer their own world over the one around them, and this can sometimes lead to alienation. This doesn’t mean the INFJ child isn’t liked by other children, they often have a natural likability and can be very popular. They simply struggle to feel truly connected or understood in a way that is fulfilling for them.
They Aim to Please
The INFJ child aims to please, and this often begins from a very young age. While other children might be selfish and focused on getting what they want, the INFJ is often the opposite. They want to please their parents and will go out of their way to make them happy. This can cause the INFJ child to neglect their own needs in order to do what is expected of them. They can often become rather close to their family, and aim for a sense of perfection in their lives. The INFJ child doesn’t like disappointing others, and this often puts a lot of the pressure on them to get good grades and do what they can to be the best child.
The Struggles of the INFJ Child
The INFJ child often faces many struggles growing up, especially being that they make up such a small percentage of the world. INFJs are rare, which makes it difficult for them to feel truly understood. They might have times of needing to retreat into their own thoughts, but have a hard time being able to do this. This need for alone time is often a struggle for the INFJ child as well, since they also want to feel connected to others. They work through trying to understand themselves but it isn’t an easy process since they often feel so different.
The INFJ child often wants to fit in, but at the same time they want to be understood for who they are. This process is something they often struggle with throughout their lives, but it starts from childhood. They might spend more time inside of their own inner minds that other people understand, but this is simply because their internal imagination is so rich and complex.
Struggles for the Parents of the INFJ Child
INFJs parents definitely have a challenge on their hands, but they are in the process of raising unique and wonderful people. It is actually a blessing and responsibility to raise an INFJ child, one that many parents might not fully understand. Their child definitely brings them struggles, since it can be difficult for them to understand their INFJ child. While this might be difficult since the INFJ can sometimes distance themselves and need to follow their own path, the parent of the INJF child needs to simply learn to respond by listening more. The most important thing for the INFJ parent is simply to give their child room to be themselves, and show them that this is more than okay. Supporting the INFJ and loving them no matter what, and letting them know that their differences make them special.
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I was raised wrong by my perants they wanted me to be the same as the other boys but I was just different they gave me pain for years the feeling was insane at some point they realized I’ll not change and here I’m on the top! Infj are the best <3
My parents gave me space to become the woman I am today. I’m the youngest, and my brother and sister are 8 & 9 years older than me respectively. I spent a lot of time alone.
I’m not shy, but before I turned 30, I was reserved and perceived as stuck-up by some. When I was a kid, I didn’t fit in. I was bullied and people scared me. Then I went to high school and met a couple of weirdos like me. That was great! Then in college I met more! Hooray.
Now, I’m an extroverted introvert. I like to socialize every now and then, but I still need to hibernate even in spring and summer!??
Great article! I’m an IFNJ.