Enneagram Type 8 Love: How Enneagram Type Eight Falls In Love

The Enneagram is a categorization of personality types based on how people perceive and respond to the world and information they gather, as well their own emotions. This describes 9 different enneagram or personality types, and each one possesses certain core beliefs which are what drives them. These beliefs drive each type and also can be limiting at times, which is why understanding them is so important. It isn’t meant to lock people into those weaknesses or limitations, instead it is meant to help them improve and find ways to maintain a sense of healthy balance in their lives. It also helps to gain a deeper understanding of what motivates the people around you, and helps to comprehend why they contradict themselves at times. Knowing the enneagram gives a clearer sense of these inner motivations and even fears.

When it comes to love and romance, understanding more about someone’s enneagram can certainly be a useful way to gauge compatibility. It can help you understand where that person is coming from and what their core values truly are. This can help uncover how to best communicate with your partner and how to find common ground. Type 8 personalities don’t want to be controlled by others and care deeply about a sense of independence. Understanding the type 8 personality is important, but also understanding how they respond in relationships and with someone romantically, is going to give you a better idea of how to communicate.

Type 8 Values

Type 8 personalities value having a sense of control in their lives, which can cause them to appear rather aggressive at times. They believe in going after the things they want, but can struggle to allow others to help or take charge, They are very assertive and value being able to charge into a situation with confidence and skilled leadership. They work to be able to control their environment, but can also be focused on controlling people. They don’t like feeling vulnerable and instead want to constantly feel like they are in charge of their emotions and not allowing those feelings to control them. 

Eights care about being self-reliant and being capable of taking on challenges without failing. They have very strong will-powers and are capable of leading people with ease. People often follow eights because of their charm and natural way of leading. They also are driven by a desire to control their environment because they want to be able to care for and protect their loved ones. They recognize that in order to be able to prevent bad things from happening to those closest to them, they need to be strong-willed and persistent. This is another thing which drives them to maintain control, and to avoid allowing others to develop any sense of control over them.

Type 8 In Love

Type 8 individuals might not be the most outwardly emotional people, but they still fall just as hard in love as anyone else. While they might not express their feelings verbally or in ways most people understand, they still feel them very deeply. When they love someone they are often very committed to that individual and in making their relationship work. When eight’s want someone they will do whatever it takes to make it happen. They will work hard for their partner and care about providing for them in many ways. Most of the time their way of expressing their love is by being supportive and helping their partner achieve their goals. They are there for them and try to solve their problems, and can even pick up the slack when they are struggling. At the same time they are good at giving space when it is needed and don’t like to be smothering.

They crave a partner who is their equal, someone who can stand up to them but who doesn’t try to control them. They value deep conversations which actually spark their minds and keep them interested. For eight’s it is important to have a partner who is capable of helping them when it comes to expressing emotions and sharing this together. They can struggle with being expressive about their feelings, and so they really need someone who can be patient and who understands that they care deeply and express this in other ways. Their partner needs to be someone who can express their own needs, but who can also be respectful of the type 8 partner and what they need. They don’t want to feel controlled, and so they really crave a connection which gives both people the freedom to be themselves.

Type 8 Relationship Struggles

Type 8 personalities can struggle when it comes to control and not wanting to give this up at all. This can make them seem a bit bossy in relationships, and so they need someone who knows how to stand up to them in this way. If they are dating someone who is a bit of a pushover this can make for struggles in the relationship. They really don’t want to feel like they are giving up control and can be a bit intense about this at times. They are self-sufficient people who believe in getting things done on their own terms, rather than constantly turning to others for guidance. This headstrong nature can certainly cause tension in romantic relationships, especially if they clash on more important things.

Eights also aren’t very emotionally expressive people and this can certainly be a struggle in relationships. Even when they are in love with someone they have a hard time expressing this verbally to them. This might pose a problem for a partner who really wants to hear them expressing their intimate feelings. This doesn’t mean eights are incapable of learning how to be more expressive, but they won’t do well with someone who is pushy about this or makes them feel bad about it. Instead they need a partner who is patient and who does not try to control them or demand certain behaviors out of them. Someone who sees them as equal and who is capable of discussing things rationally and calmly, is going to go a long way with the type 8 individual.


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