ESTP Flirting & Dating: How to Attract an ESTP

When it comes to flirting and making connections the ESTP can often be rather charming. They enjoy getting to know new people and enjoy being social. The outgoing nature of the ESTP does make them appear more flirtatious, even when that isn’t their intention. Oftentimes when the ESTPs is appearing to be flirty, they are really just getting to know people and being friendly. They like to experience new things, which often means connecting with people and finding ways to step outside of their own comfort zones.

ESTP Flirting

When the ESTP flirts, they can be rather charming and know how to appeal to someone’s specific desires. They know how to say the right things in order to make someone feel truly flattered and interested. ESTPs often have a way with words, especially when they are around people they feel comfortable with. They enjoy a bit of harmless flirting, and might not even view it as flirting themselves. For others, this can be misunderstood since the ESTP just naturally likes interacting, and their charming demeanor makes it seem like they are being very flirtatious. They enjoy being able to make other people feel special, and so sometimes flirting can do this. For the ESTP it isn’t meant to confuse people or make their intentions seem more than just playful. Some people might see them as leading others on, but that really is not the case.

When the ESTP sincerely likes someone and wants to show this, they can be a little bit different with the way they flirt. Their usually charming demeanor can sometimes be dimmed down a bit, and the ESTP might feel nervous around this person. When they truly like someone, they try to be flirtatious and show that they are fun to be around as much as they can, but it can be challenging for them at times. The ESTP might need some time to warm up to this person before they really let all of their personality shine through.

In a Relationship

In a relationship, ESTPs actually give a lot to their loved ones and seek out ways to make them happy. ESTPs might even shower their partner with gifts and surprises, wanting to make them feel special. They will go out of their way to create fun and exciting ways to make them feel loved and appreciated. While people can sometimes see the ESTP as disloyal, this really is not true to their type. When they do commit to someone, they want to make them happy and will go above and beyond to do this. The ESTP who is capable of being loyal will take this very seriously, and they care about wanting to be completely honest with the person they love most. 

Some ESTPs might not be focused on committing to someone since they do enjoy exploring different options. While there might be some who are this way, that isn’t something that should be labeled for every ESTP. While they enjoy exploring and keeping their options open, it is the immature ESTP who cannot be honest about this to their partner. When they aren’t quite as mature, they don’t really know how to be upfront about their desires to explore, whereas a more mature ESTP will be sincere about whether or not they are ready to make the commitment and settle down.

Casual Dating

ESTPs often enjoy casual dating when they are young since it gives them a chance to explore different options. Being able to date more casually allows them to meet new people and often make friends out of it. They don’t necessarily do this with the goal of finding someone to settle down with, but ESTPs do like going out and finding new things to do. When it comes to dating, they enjoy the experiences they obtain from it since they are outgoing and friendly people. Making new friends is something that energizes the ESTP, and so while others might be drained by casual dating, for them, it can be fun. The younger ESTP is often drawn to this since it gives them the chance to explore and keep their options open before they are ready to really settle down with one person.

When they start to get older, they might grow weary of casual dating and the entire experience involved with it. They really only like this as a means of figuring out what they like and learning more about themselves and those around them. They simply start growing tired of this once they have already experienced plenty of it and are ready to find someone they can be comfortable with and not feel like they have to constantly seek to impress this person.

How to Attract the ESTP

ESTPs are attracted to people who are confident and have a bit of a mystery to their personality. Someone who is mysterious and expresses this in a charming way will really draw the ESTP in. They really enjoy being around people who are confident in themselves and not constantly looking for validation. While they do want to give validation to people they care about, they just don’t like feeling obligated to do this. For the ESTP, someone who is confident in themselves without turning to others for answers is truly appealing. They are also really attracted to people who have the desire to seek out adventure and shake things up once in a while. ESTPs can become bored easily, so they really need someone who can keep them on their toes and is willing to take chances once in a while.


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