The Struggles Each Myers-Briggs Type Faces When Ending a Bad Relationship

Some people find it easy to move on from a bad relationship, while others struggle with this decision. Here is how we believe each personality type handles the process of ending a bad relationship


INFJs often have a hard time letting go of a relationship gone bad. The INFJ will especially have a hard time if this relationship was once very good. They might hold out hope that things can be mended and that the other person can be changed for the better. INFJs often feel like a failure if they cannot make things work in their relationship. If they let someone in enough to share something special with them, they have a very hard time letting go. They may want to do their best to make thing work even when it is clearly hopeless. If the person is cruel to them the INFJ may continue to give them chances until they finally shut them out of their lives for good. If the relationship simply ends because both parties could not make it work, the INFJ may struggle to let go completely. INFJs do not open themselves up to people easily, and may struggle with the thought of having to do this again. When the INFJ is finally done, they are truly done for good.


ENFJs take their close relationships very seriously, especially their romantic ones. ENFJs are often perfectionists and may take the loss of a relationship as a personal failure. They may attempt to take the blame even if the other person has done just as much wrong. They want to be able to make others happy, and if a relationship doesn’t work, they may feel like they failed in their goal. ENFJs often do have a hard time letting go of people in their lives, and often will stay in a bad relationship longer than they should. Once the ENFJ decides they are fed up, they will often shut the person out of their lives without looking back. They take a long time to be pushed to that point, but once they do there is no going back.


INFPs do not enter into relationships lightly, and often take them very seriously. Because of this they may struggle with ending a bad relationship. If the INFP still feels a connection towards the person they are with, they will want to do whatever it takes to fight for what they have. Being that they are idealists they might attempt to stay positive and keep hope that things can and will get better. Once the INFP attempts all avenues possible to mend the relationship, they will probably be the one to end it. They work to find a resolution but once it is evident that nothing can be done, they are willing to move on and step away. The INFP often hates the idea of giving up on someone, especially when they have invested so much in that person. In the end they are capable of moving on, since they are very hopeful of finding a real and lasting connection. Finding this end is hard for the INFP, and they will often struggle with it for a while. The INFP is likely to stay single for a while to allow themselves to mend properly.


ENFPs are often seen as individuals who may bounce around in relationships. ENFPs do often care to explore new avenues and enjoy trying to figure out what they truly want. The truth is that once and ENFP finds themselves committing to someone they may have a hard time leaving when things go bad. They often idealize people and attempt to see the good in them. They want to believe in others and trust that people can truly change. They often do not like failure and want to put in their best effort to make things work. Once the ENFP sees that things are not going to work, they are very capable of walking away from the bad relationship. They probably do not want things to end on a bad note, and may attempt to make a clean exit. ENFPs truly hate being responsible for other people’s pain, but are capable of realizing that sometimes you have to move on.


INTJs are often very capable of ending a bad relationship. They do take their commitments seriously, so when they make a choice to end things it is because they realize it is the right thing to do. They are often very direct and will flat out tell the person that they are breaking up with them, and will be willing to logically explain their reasoning. They will not make this choice without fully understanding that it is the best course of action. If someone is not holding up their end of the relationship the INTJ may give them an ultimatum and explain what they need. If the person continues to fail the INTJ, they will be perfectly capable of ending things. They do not believe in wasting energy in a relationship that is clearly doomed to fail. They often remain friends with their exes because they lack the emotional and confusing ending that most breakups suffer.


ENTJs are extremely loyal people and will often stick by others. When a relationship has obviously taken a turn for the worst the ENTJ is capable of making the move to end things. They will attempt to figure out what the core problems are that are causing the relationship to go sour. The ENTJ are often good at seeing the best way to fix a problem and may apply this strategy to their relationships. They may see it as a failure if they do not attempt to mend the situation as best as they can. Once the ENTJ is sure that they have attempted everything to make things work, they will logically have to end things. They may attempt to make it cordial and will dislike the idea of ending things on a bad note. ENTJs are loyal individuals and because of this may struggle with ending relationships without in depth consideration.


INTPs do not jump into relationships lightly, and often take them very seriously when they do. They are not the most open people, and take time to develop feelings for someone. Before they open up to a relationship they want to make sure that it is truly what they want. When the INTP sees that the relationship is bad, they may attempt to find a solution to the problems. They develop deep connections with people and do not like letting go of those connections. The INTP may feel a bit of guilt and potentially will blame themselves if they cannot fix things. Ultimately the INTP is capable of ending a relationship that has clearly gone bad, but will possibly sulk for a while before they completely move on.


ENTPs are often very capable of letting go of a bad relationship. They do not want to waste their time committing to someone if it is obvious that the relationship is not working. They don’t want to be held back because someone is constantly causing them problems. Being with someone they do not feel comfortable with is a terrible situation for an ENTP. They want to be sure that they can commit to someone, because they enjoy keeping their options open. They do make deep connections with people and may be hurt for a while after the relationship is over, but they will often find ways to keep themselves distracted. ENTPs do not want to stay with someone who they feel they cannot trust or rely on.


ISTJs are intensely loyal and committed individuals, and often struggle or even refuse to end a bad relationship. They hold their commitments very seriously, and once they have chosen to be with someone they will do whatever it takes to make it work. They will work very hard to find a way to fix the problems and will often just deal with them no matter how hard it appears. ISTJs dislike ending a relationship because they often see it as giving up. They realize that every relationship experiences struggles, and they are willing to find a way around them. They dislike letting go of something when they have the conscious choice to be there. Because of this strong sense of duty and loyalty, ISTJs will often stay in a relationship that is bad, until the other person attempts to end things.


ESTJs are very loyal and committed individuals, and often have a hard time ending a bad relationship. They may feel like a failure if they cannot make things work, and strive to find a way to mend things. ESTJs are more willing to walk away than their introverted likenesses, the ISTJ. But ultimately if the person they are with continues to abuse the relationship, the ESTJ will be capable of moving on. It takes an immense amount of negativity for the ESTJ to finally make the decisions to walk away. ESTJs believe in working to resolve the issue rather than running away from it.


ISFJs struggle with ending bad relationships. They want to make things work and may blame themselves if the other person is not happy. The ISFJ has a strong sense of commitment and often feel like they are failing if they cannot make things work. They feel extremely guilty and do not want to hurt others, even if those people are hurting them. ISFJs may struggle for a long time in a bad relationship and not know how to end things. They will often blame themselves for most of the problems, and feel like they need to find a way to make things better. They can sometimes be overly hopeful that things will get better and that the hard times in the relationship will end. ISFJs may cling to the idea that they can fix other people as well, and perceive the inability to make the other person happy as their own fault.


ESFJs often do have a hard time letting go of relationships. When things go sour the ESFJ may ignore it or pretend like everything is fine. To outsiders the ESFJ is often very good at making it seem like the relationship is great. They may feel ashamed for staying with someone that they know they should leave. Because of this the ESFJ struggles with receiving proper feedback from friends and family and will continue to stay in the negative environment. ESFJs can often take the guilt upon themselves, and blame themselves for the other person’s actions. They may feel inadequate or insecure and feel like a failure because they cannot “fix” the other person or the relationship. ESFJs have a hard time hurting others and this may be another reason that they struggle to end a bad relationship. Even if they are not happy they might stay for fear of upsetting the other person. Once ESFJs do end a bad relationship it is probably in a somewhat harsh and direct way. Once they have had enough, they have truly had enough and there is no going back.


ISTPs rarely struggle with ending a bad relationship. They enjoy having their freedom and will not stay with someone out of fear of loneliness. ISTPs can often clearly see when the relationship is bad and will logically come to this conclusion before things go too far. When it is time to end things the ISTP will probably be very direct and clear that the relationship is over. They are willing to work at things if they see the potential to fix the problem, and will often find ways to make the relationship work. If it is clear to the ISTP that the relationship cannot be mended, they will be willing to cut ties and walk away.


ESTPs may struggle with ending a bad relationship but will eventually become fed up if the other person refuses to change. ESTPs may have a hard time seeing the situation clearly and will attempt to place blame for situations. If they care for the person the ESTP will attempt to find any way possible to fix the bad relationship. They do not want to let go of what they have worked to build, and would much prefer to find a solution. If the relationship continues down a negative path, the ESTP will eventually find someone else to move onto.


ISFPs are sensitive and caring individuals, but are often capable of ending a bad relationship. ISFPs will stick around if things are good and are very loyal to people that they care about. If the ISFP sees that the relationship is clearly no good, they are willing to find a way to let go. This will probably end in tears and the ISFP will feel immense guilt over hurting the other person. In the end they realize that they have to let go if things are just not right. They will feel very bad about hurting the other person and will try their best to make sure they are okay.


ESFPs are very willing to let go of a terrible relationship. They do not enjoy feeling trapped by someone and will be capable of letting go when the time is right. ESFPs dislike feeling like the other person is not trying in the relationship, and will often be the one to end things if it becomes a struggle. ESFPs are capable of deep caring and often feel guilty about ending things after it is all over. But that doesn’t mean the ESFP will not stick strongly by their decision to make the break.

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