INFP Hurt Feelings: How To Deal With Emotional Wounds
Everyone has to endure getting their feelings hurt once in a while, in some instances it is more severe than others. While some people might handle this by burying those feelings and moving on, this isn’t the natural response for everyone. Being sensitive to hurt feelings isn’t something to be ashamed of, having emotions is a natural part of life. For some personality types it does seem easier to receive hurt feelings, especially from those they love. For others it seems to be harder to offend them or get underneath their skin, but that doesn’t mean it is impossible. Anyone with very human emotions is going to get hurt once in a while, whether it is from someone intentionally trying to wound or simply accidental.
INFPs can certainly be deemed as sensitive to criticism and getting their feelings hurt. This isn’t necessarily untrue, they have strong emotions and can be rather sensitive when someone tries to dig at them or even sometimes when it is not their intentional at all. INFPs feel things very deeply and are connected to their inner emotions, which can make them sensitive to certain insults or criticism. This doesn’t mean they are going to fall apart or crumble at the first sign of a slight, but it can be something which the INFP has to process on their own terms and in their own way. People often misunderstand the INFP and how they deal with those strong inner emotions, and so it can lead to plenty of incorrect stereotypes.
INFP & Hurt Feelings
INFPs can certainly be sensitive to criticism, especially when it comes from someone they care about. They are much more susceptible to the things their loved ones say, as opposed to strangers trying to insult them. INFPs aren’t as fragile as people might think, and often hide certain emotions in hopes of powering through it. Just because they get hurt easily doesn’t mean there is something wrong with them, they simply feel things deeply which is actually which makes them more caring and understanding people. This ability to connect with others is a strength, one which makes the INFP better at helping others and being a support system when they are struggling. They care about being there for the people they love, and because they are naturally sensitive they also want to find a way to avoid hurting others. Being someone who can feel things so deeply can be a strength for the INFP, allowing them to connect with people in ways that not everyone is capable of. It also helps them be more conscious of the need to make a difference in the world around them, which is often something the INFPs deeply desire to accomplish.
INFPs do however, find it easy to feel wounded by someone they care for. Even smaller things could come off hurtful to the INFP, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t aware if someone’s intentions were good. If the person who hurt the INFP didn’t do this on purpose, they might be likely to pretend as if everything is fine and continue on like they were not hurt. This can be something which makes it hard for the INFP to process these feelings, since they really need to be able to express them in order to heal. INFPs don’t want to be seen as emotional or sensitive, which makes it hard when they really need to be able to be honest about those inner emotions they are dealing with. This can be something which causes the INFP to retreat inward, and they might even seclude themselves from others. It can be hard for them to accept when someone hurts them, not wanting to feel like their loved ones just don’t care. The INFP might start to distance themselves from people the more they find themselves getting hurt by them. This can be a negative thing after a while, since it can cause the INFP to become guarded and struggle to make connections which are important to them. Sometimes the INFP finds themselves getting hurt because they are sentimental or nostalgic people, and their loved ones might not understand this. Having someone brush off their needs or feelings without realizing they are doing it, still becomes hurtful to the INFP.
How to Deal
Being honest is one of the most important steps for the INFP when it comes to handling hurt feelings. They sometimes find themselves wanting to distance from others when they are hurt, not wanting to expose that they are upset. Being so used to having people put them down for being “too sensitive” or “too emotional” makes it hard for them to feel safe opening up when they are hurt. For the INFP being able to express that they are upset and why, is truly valuable and helps them to heal and move on. This is also an important thing for them to learn if they want to maintain those close relationships, otherwise they find themselves pulling away when that isn’t what they actually want. Being upfront about those feelings and expressing them clearly, can help the people around them to understand where they are coming from and hopefully work on making amends so that they can move on from the situation.
If the INFP is struggling to express those emotions they can start by journaling or writing them down, simply for themselves. Taking this time to see their own thought process and feelings on paper can give them time to really process everything better. It can help the INFP makes sense of the situation so that when it comes time to share those feelings with their loved ones, they feel a more clear and precise sense of how to do this. It gives them comfort and makes it easier to make those connections, without getting all over the place and confused when they go to actually express themselves. It isn’t always easy to make this step, but it is important for the INFP who wants to learn how to maintain those emotions in a healthy way for themselves and for others.