INFJ Feelings & Emotions: How the INFJ Handles Inner Feelings
Everyone copes with and responds to emotions differently. For some, it can be a more challenging process. Not everyone is as comfortable with their own emotions as they are with the emotions of others. It is important to consider each individual person, but personality types can sometimes help with the first steps toward understanding someone. Learning the basic ways they process information and express themselves can help you get closer to really understanding this person better. When it comes to the INFJ, emotions are complex, and how they process them might be confusing for some people.
They Are Empathetic People
INFJs are naturally empathetic people, which helps them when it comes to understanding the emotions of others. Seeing someone express themselves emotionally is not going to scare the INFJ or make them feel uncomfortable. They are often used to connecting with the emotions of others and can listen to them and try to help ease their stress. When it comes to the emotions of other people, the INFJ can sense them and understand them often better than they understand themselves.
Their sense of empathy helps them to feel for those around them and want to do their best to help. This makes the INFJ a naturally more caring person, but it does sometimes cause them to neglect their own needs. Their focus can become so much on those around them and trying to do anything to make them happy. The INFJ can sometimes feel stressed if they have to do something for themselves or speak out about their own feelings. For them, to go-to response is to find someone else’s needs to tend to and find ways of focusing on their emotions instead. INFJs do sometimes prefer to throw themselves into the needs and feelings of others since their own emotions can feel overwhelming. Instead of allowing themselves to really experience these feelings, which might be confusing or upsetting, they focus their energy on someone else. This can come from a fear of really understanding themselves and a fear of failing when it comes time to explore their own desires and dreams.
Their Own Emotions Can Be Challenging
It can be difficult for the INFJ to really focus on their own emotions and they might be afraid to do so. It can be confusing for the INFJ to try and reach deep into their feelings sometimes. While they do often have a gentle idea of what they are feeling and experiencing, going layers in to analyze this can be challenging. INFJs sometimes bury these emotions and don’t really know how to express them outwardly. This can come from a fear of being judged or misunderstood since they do often feel different from those around them.
For the INFJ, expressing their inner emotions can be a constant challenge. They don’t appreciate the feeling of rejection when they open up to someone, so being this vulnerable is often something they fear. Because of this fear, the INFJ rarely feels comfortable opening up about their own inner feelings and emotions, so they process them internally and often keep them from others. For the INFJ, this can definitely be stressful at times since they might want to open up but just don’t feel that sense of trust to do so. They also might feel like their own feelings and desires are so different from other people, which can make them question their own emotions. When they feel like they are different, it makes them sometimes wonder if there is something wrong with feeling a certain way. This can cause the INFJ to retreat from others, not feeling like putting themselves in this position is worth the risk. They will likely start to change their way of thinking when they meet someone who is understanding and appreciative of their differences. For the INFJ, it really takes finding this type of open and trusting person for them to start to open up about their own feelings and desires.
Feeling Guilty For Their Feelings
INFJs can often experience a sense of guilt over their own emotions, feeling selfish for really focusing on them at all. They care about others, and the more they are around people who stifle their emotions, the more they have doubts about themselves. They are likely to experience a sense of guilt when they prioritize themselves and their own emotions, believing they should just keep it to themselves. If their own feelings or desires might get in the way of what someone else wants, the INFJ is likely to shut themselves down. This can cause them to bury these emotions for far too long, leaving them feeling truly drained because of it.
While INFJs can naturally connect with others and understand their emotions, their own internal feelings can be more challenging. They instead focus inward towards their sense of intuition, seeing the future outcomes and using their vivid inner minds as an escape. Their minds are so filled with imagination and complex thoughts, but the INFJ doesn’t really know how to process these things in a way that can be expressed to others. These complexities only make it more difficult for them to sift through their emotions and express them to those closest to the INFJ. Even if they deeply want to search for someone to open up to, they may feel a sense of guilt when the time comes. They don’t want their own feelings to somehow get in the way of what someone else is experiencing or wanting to do with their lives. The focus on others can be something that sometimes causes the INFJ to forget the balance and take time for their own thoughts, feelings, and inner desires.
Read More About the INFJ:
Complete INFJ Article Collection
This Post is Brought To You By BetterHelp
Thank you so much for this. I had a horrible day yesterday and a lot had to do with this. I also want to share this with my therapist. She consistently tells me that it’s okay to allow my own needs, etc.
Good article. Right on the mark. I wonder if other INFJs are like me….I have a treasure chest inside me which is filled with other people’s secrets. I never reveal a confidence.
What would you recommend for an INFJ who wants to get out of the closet ?
You guys read me like a book. Such a beautiful article. I could not escape any thing you said and it felt so good to be understood. I have been abused alot and didn’t find out I was an INFJ until recently. I keep turning up ENFJ in old exams but it’s nice to see those trying to understand us.