Here’s Why Opposites Attract, Based on Personality Type
While it is a common phrase to say that “opposites attract” in more than just a strictly scientific manner- it can be difficult to understand why we can be so drawn to someone so different from us. Here is why you find yourself drawn to your opposites, according to your personality type.
INFJs are often attracted to people who are open and expressive, and unafraid of taking chances. INFJs can be seen as reserved in front of many people, simply because they keep a lot inside. While they are passionate people, only a few individuals get to see this side of them. They often find themselves drawn to individuals who are unafraid of expressing this, and who take risks without reservation. INFJs find themselves also intrigued by people who do as they please without feeling restrained by others. This sort of free-spirit can really leave them feeling awestruck and enamored.
For ENFJs it can be rather intriguing to be around someone who is more reserved. They might see this person as an intriguing challenge, and even a puzzle to figure out. This sort of mysterious attitude is almost intoxicating for the ENFJ, and leaves them very interested. They might also enjoy feeling like having someone love them who is so mysterious and challenging, means that person truly cares when they show is outwardly. Someone with a logical and internally focused mind, is truly exciting for the outgoing and friendly ENFJ personality.
INFPs can often find themselves attracted to someone who is strong and assertive. They enjoy having someone who wants to protect them and look out for their well-being. That sort of strength and togetherness helps the INFP feel like they have someone who really has their back. INFPs are sensitive souls, who spend a lot of their time daydreaming. They are often intrigued by someone who is more into taking action and who knows how to put together a future plan for them and their relationship. To them it is attractive that someone so strategic takes their relationship seriously, and wants to make a future including the INFP.
ENFPs are attracted to their opposites because they are both reserved and strategic. ENFPs spend their time daydreaming and imagine different possibilities, and while they want to feel free to be themselves they do enjoy someone who can keep them grounded. Having someone who is capable of taking care of the day to day thing, allows the ENFP to enjoy the things that make them happy. They don’t want to have to keep track of boring tasks, but having a partner who takes care of these things makes them feel truly loved. ENFPs also enjoy someone who is a bit of a mystery to them, and requires a little bit of effort to understand.
INTJs are focused and intelligent people who value being challenged by others. They are often drawn to people who are expressive and open, because it gives them someone to learn from. INTJs can be intrigued by people who are lighthearted and friendly, even if they struggle to understand them sometimes. They also enjoy these free-spirited people because they are often independent, so it gives the INTJ the space they need. They can enjoy watching their partner experiencing new things, and might feel inspired to push themselves in directions they normally wouldn’t.
ENTJs can find themselves drawn to people who are sensitive and compassionate. They are often intrigued by these qualities because they signify that the individual is also loyal and trustworthy. ENTJs value honesty and want to be with someone who they can trust. They often find themselves attracted to people who are very open with their feelings, even though this isn’t a quality the ENTJ shares with them. Seeing someone who can express themselves openly, helps the ENTJ feel comforted. The tender qualities of their opposites can help the ENTJ feel more open to romance and affection.
While INTPs enjoy spending plenty of time by themselves, they can be drawn to people who are outgoing and sociable. They truly enjoy being around someone who can challenge them, and give them a unique perspective. They can find themselves interested in people who are naturally good at being center of attention, and will enjoy watching them shine. INTPs also are drawn to individuals who are emotionally supportive and compassionate, even if the INTP has a hard time understanding emotions. It helps them to feel safe being themselves, without feeling pressured or afraid of their own feelings.
ENTPs can often be drawn to someone who is both affectionate and who enjoys setting down roots. While ENTPs enjoy experiencing new things, they also find it appealing when someone is sturdy and trustworthy. ENTPs want to feel free to be themselves, but they can find themselves drawn to someone who is responsible and can take care of them when things get a little rough. They enjoy being around individuals who are moral and compassionate, it can really help the ENTP gain perspective. They also enjoy how someone who is different from them, can really help the ENTP grow and challenge themselves.
ISTJs can find themselves intrigued by someone who is open and expressive, since it helps them explore new parts of themselves. ISTJs can sometimes find themselves stuck inside of a routine, but that is simply because it feels safe to them. There is something exhilarating about being around a person who can pull them outside of their comfort zone. ISTJs simply don’t want to make choices that could possibly be harmful, but having someone to guide them can be exciting. They enjoy that this person can bring out another side of their personality, and help them feel inspired.
ESTJs often find themselves drawn to someone who lives in the moment and enjoy having fun. ESTJs are so focused on working hard that they can sometimes lose sight of experiencing things fully. ESTJs can spend so much time building up their careers and being responsible, that they forget to really reap the benefits. They often enjoy being around someone who is both passionate and spontaneous, since it keeps them always guessing and feeling challenged. ESTJs also enjoy the chase a little bit, and someone who is free-spirited and independent is going to keep them on their toes.
ISFJs are compassionate and internal people, which can sometimes leave them intrigued by someone who is logical and outgoing. ISFJs are intrigued by someone who is a bit mysterious, and find themselves excited by this. They might be drawn to the more adventurous type, because it gives them the impression that they need someone who care for them. ISFJs enjoy being able to play the caretaker role, and want to feel needed by their loved ones. Someone who is adventurous but maybe lacks responsible qualities, often needs someone like the ISFJ to help them.
ESFJs can often find themselves intrigued by someone who is logical and a bit reserved with their feelings. This draws them in because it is almost like a challenge or a riddle to be solved. Being able to get close to someone so withdrawn, is a naturally intriguing experience for the ESFJ. This is because they want to feel valuable and needed by their loved ones, and getting close to someone who is a bit internal makes them feel truly special in that relationship. ESFJs also find themselves inspired by someone who is very intelligent and capable of figuring out things that others cannot.
ISTPs are rather internal people who enjoy having the freedom to do their own thing. Someone who is constantly trying to control the ISTP can be a bit unnerving for them, but they find themselves drawn to compassionate people. ISTPS are attracted to their opposites because this person can help them feel cared for and appreciated. They might even enjoy being around that person because it challenges them in different ways that others cannot.
ESTPs are often drawn to their opposites because these people bring out a more intimate side to the ESTP. Someone who is connected to their emotions and who cares about the well-being of others, is a bit of a mystery to the ESTP. They enjoy feeling like they have to figure this person out, and like it is a bit of a challenge to really peel back their layers. ESTPs are intrigued by someone who makes their decisions in a moral and considerate manner, but who doesn’t attempt to force others to behave the same way.
ISFPs can often be drawn to people who are strong-willed and assertive. This is intriguing for the ISFP because it is a bit difficult for them to fully understand, and they enjoy that challenge. For ISFPs someone who is strong and confident, is appealing because that person is often protective of their loved ones. Being around someone who can care for them and protect them from cruel people, makes the ISFP feel truly loved.
ESFPs can find themselves drawn to people who are both internal and very logical. They find themselves intrigued by these qualities because it often means this person is focused on building a future with them. ESFPs enjoy feeling taken care of by their loved ones, and want someone who is capable of handling their occasionally reckless and spontaneous behaviors. Someone who is strong and assertive can really help the ESFP remain grounded when they lose sight of the future.
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