INFJ Love: How INFJs Fall In Love
We all experience falling in love and being in relationships in our own unique ways. For the INFJ love is often an important thing, but it can be difficult for them to really find it, since they do have high standards for what they want in these types of relationships. INFJs in relationships definitely have a unique set of values and ways in which they give and receive. So here are some things you should know about how the INFJ falls in love, and how they respond to this.
They Are Idealistists
INFJs are often idealistists, especially when it comes to their romantic relationships. They invest so much into this idea of what love should be, and so it becomes hard for them to really deal with these expectations at times. INFJs do sometimes put people they love up on pedestals, seeing them as something perfect when this isn’t possible. This can lead to them feeling disappointed later in the relationship, but they struggle to really let go even if they feel they should.
The INFJ idealist does expect a lot from falling in love and from their connections, simply because they can often build this up in their minds. When they spend a lot of time imagining what it could be like to truly fall in love with someone, and want to become wrapped up in this. INFJs don’t really want things to get out of hand in this way, but their minds do have a tendency to run away with them.
They Fall Hard, But Not Fast
INFJs definitely fall in love hard when they do, but this does not happen quickly. They often take time before really opening up to someone, and so falling in love can be a slow process for the INFJ. When they truly fall for someone they want to be sure that this is for real, and often take time before they can trust someone enough to let them into their hearts. For the INFJ it isn’t easy to just jump into things, and they are this way with love as well. They don’t just fall in love at first sight, even though part of them might start to feel something towards someone rather quickly because of their strong sense of intuition. Thy simply don’t allow themselves to dive in, and really need to be patient with their feelings and hope for a partner who is patient with their process.
While INFJs might not fall fast, when they do fall for someone it is something which means very much to them. They feel everything so deeply, and so for them falling in love is a very serious and intense experience. They often put everything they have into the person they fall for, and truly want to give their hearts openly. INFJs really do invest a lot into the people they love and when they fall in love with someone they don’t hold back. INFJs want to do anything they can to make this person happy and to immerse themselves into these feelings.
They Struggle to Let Go
While INFJs take awhile to fall in love, once they do letting go can be deeply challenging for them. This is often why they can be so hesistent to jump into love, because having to let go can be heartbreaking and effect the INFJ for a long time. They don’t know how to really move on when someone has made their mark on their souls, and so they don’t want to take this risk when it comes to love. When they love someone the INFJ might feel this for a long time even after things have ended, even after they have found a way to appear as if they have moved on. They take love seriously and so for them it doesn’t feel right to abandon these emotions and just pretend they never felt something so intense and powerful.
For the INFJ letting go or moving on when something has affected them so deeply, just doesn’t feel natural. While they might not want others to know that they are struggling to let go, deep down it can take much longer for the INFJ. When they fall in love, this is something which reaches the depths of their heart and soul, making it a part of who they are for a long time to come.
They Can Be Cynics, But Deep Down They Are Romantics
Most INFJs can appear to be cynics on the outside, while deep down they often possess the heart of a true romantic. They use their minds and can be rather logical people, and so they might not openly express these more sentimental or emotional parts of themselves outwardly. They don’t want to appear like they are hopeless romantics, and so most of the time their outer shell can be rather cynical. INFJs really are contradicting people most of the time, and so they can possess both cynical and highly romantic qualities. They will make consistently cynical comments and behave as if they are someone who does not believe in true love, and might even be hesitant to take a risk on it.
Deep down most INFJs believe in love, even to the point of valuing it above everything else, even their sanity. They believe in romance and really dream of being able to let go and drown in these emotions. They do often dream of this type of love, one they can really ignore the rest of the world for and experience with every fiber of their being. For the INFJ this type of love is something they might desire, but can be a bit fearful of at times. They know that if they let themselves truly fall, this means they can end up with a badly broken heart in the end of it all.
They Give Everything
While INFJs might have some contradicting feelings about love and the way they really fall into it, they do give everything when they are in love with someone. INFJs give a lot of themselves to those around them, and really believe in doing whatever it takes to make these people happy. When the INFJ falls in love it is no different, it might even be a bit more intense for them. They want to make the object of their objection happy in any and every way possible. INFJs will work hard to please their partner, and want to find ways to provide for them and bring them joy. For the INFJ this can actually be a lot of pressure when they are in love, since they want to live up to these expectations they set for themselves.
INFJs have big hearts and will often do anything for the people they love, and so being in love only amplifies these emotions. This is why it matters who they fall in love with and they might be fearful of it at first. Because the INFJ can fall so hard that they give all of themselves to someone, losing parts of who they are in the process. When the INFJ finds the right person it can be a truly magical experience, drawing this person into their own bubble and their own inner world. The way they fall in love is often a rare process, something which can enrich the lives of those around them in such a unique way. For the INFJ falling in love might be frightening, but they definitely experience it intensely.