Enneagram Type 3 Flirting & Dating: How to Attract Enneagram Type Three

The Enneagram is a categorization of personality types based on how people perceive and respond to the world and information they gather, as well their own emotions. This describes 9 different enneagram or personality types, and each one possesses certain core beliefs which are what drives them. These beliefs drive each type and also can be limiting at times, which is why understanding them is so important. It isn’t meant to lock people into those weaknesses or limitations, instead it is meant to help them improve and find ways to maintain a sense of healthy balance in their lives. It also helps to gain a deeper understanding of what motivates the people around you, and helps to comprehend why they contradict themselves at times. Knowing the enneagram gives a clearer sense of these inner motivations and even fears.

Dating can be difficult at times, and so understanding your partner and how they communicate can be a great first step towards connecting better with them. While knowing someone’s enneagram cannot instantly make you closer or give you all of the answers, it can help you learn and understand their motivations a bit better. Knowing where someone is coming from can clarify certain aspects of your relationship and help you to communicate with them in ways they understand and connect to. Learning someone’s flirting and dating style can help avoid certain miscommunications, especially towards someone you truly want to grow closer to. 

Type 3 Values

The type 3 personality can be somewhat status-conscious, since they are driven by a desire to feel worthy and valuable. They care about how they are seen in society, and so they are constantly pushing themselves to achieve great things. They want to be someone who can accomplish their goals and be impressive to others. They can appear to be workaholics because of this, pushing themselves to always be at their best. They want to be indispensable in the workplace and to those around them, by striving to be someone who sets themselves apart from others. The type 3 person wants to be viewed as truly valuable and special, someone who goes above and beyond to get things done. They are in pursuit of success in hopes of feeling a sense of validation from people. They care about being admired and having people look up to them and their accomplishments. At their best this makes the type 3 inspirational to others, someone who strives to be a good role model and confident in themselves and what they are capable of achieving. They are often capable in everything they do and each task they take on, wanting to learn how to improve and become the best at what they are working on.

Type 3 Flirting Style

When it comes to flirting the type 3 individual is likely to be more direct about their intentions. They enjoy getting to know someone and learning if they are compatible, but once they are interested they aren’t afraid of showing this. They don’t like wasting time, as they care about accomplishing important goals and don’t want to be held back. They are very goal-oriented and driven people, wanting to always push themselves to continue moving forward. This is something which plays into how they are in relationships, since they care about getting to the point. While they can certainly be flirtatious for the sake of enjoying themselves and having fun, when they truly like someone it becomes much more obvious. When they are interested in getting to know someone this is because they want to know if they can make something real with that person. They are rarely afraid to flirt with someone or show that they are interested, and instead can be rather upfront about their intentions when they want to be.

Type 3 Attraction

Three’s are often attracted to people who are just as driven as they are, and care about someone who shares similar goals and aspirations. For the type 3 individual their work is often very important to them, and they want to be able to push themselves to get things done efficiently and in the way they want. Pushing to reach their goals and continue to grow in their career and as a person, is truly important for them. They need a partner who appreciates this about them and encourages them to continue working towards those things which matter to them. Someone who is also rather driven and wants to work hard to achieve things in life, is going to be very appealing for them. They would struggle with a partner who is flighty and incapable of putting in the work needed to get what they want from life. Someone who doesn’t have a sense of direction or drive is unlikely to draw the attention of the type 3 person.

Having someone who can give them space to work is definitely important. Being with someone who is appreciative and capable of expressing that they are proud of the type 3 partner, is truly vital for them. They need a combination of affirmations and space, wanting someone who can understand those needs without having to constantly be told. This is often why they are drawn to people who have their own personal goals and sense of independence, truly finding themselves attracted to people who have a deep drive to be the best at whatever they do.

Things to Avoid

It is important to avoid being too clingy or emotionally needy with the type 3 partner. While they can be supportive and loving, they become quickly drained by someone who is constantly in need of emotional expression. Someone who needs to express their inner emotions frequently and seems to be rather needy in this way, is going to be extremely unneappling for them. They need a partner who is independent, but someone who doesn’t want to constantly dive deep into their feelings and emotional needs. This doesn’t mean they are incapable of connecting with their partners feelings, they just cannot handle this frequently.